new ends

so last night as i'm lying in the same bed i've had for.. 4 years now, i couldn't help but think back to this blog. this blog that i've abandoned to write all my thoughts and dreams and other deep stuff of the sara nature. so! here i am. back. i have this class that is online on thursdays around this time, and so i figured i ought to go home and write in here. i want to write regularly to now thursdays around 1, expect a new post. i'm quite excited about this. mostly for myself so i can get out of my own head. for those readers who are not aware, i'm engaged. very and extremely happy about this. his name is saul. he's short and brazilian. perfect for me. is it necessary to say that he's short and brazilian? not to the average person but if he and i were separated in a crowded room and i told you those adjectives about him, you would sure as heck find him. i can't go on and on about how i feel when i'm around him and how he makes me feel adventurous and alive or how he has this tiny freckle that looks like a heart... too far? absolutely. do i care? not at all. lol due to the fact that i probably have 1 reader and i pray with all my might that that 1 reader does not know me or my situation at all. when i say situation, i mean life. but for the other people who happen upon this mess, i'm sorry. you get to hear the sad ups and downs of a delightful teenagers life. spelling counts here but punctuation? not exactly. so yea! i'm back. thursdays are my writing days. i never know what to write here but i'll just start spilling out my guts. saul and i were going to elope. yes. it's true. enough of that. but i'm currently going to school. i want to finish up my darned associated degree. gol. no one needs it anyway. saul still opens up the door for me. i've known him for 4 years now. oh yea, i knew him when i was a sophomore in high school. he played soccer with allen and came over to our house quite frequently. i planned on writing something really extravagant on this time back. like thank you's or something but that did not happen. but it still can! thank you kinda feminist aunt for making me into a somewhat headstrong woman. and also my abuelita for the stubborn part. for will for caring enough to print out my blog so i can have a physical copy, for justin for breaking me down so i can build myself back up. (good breaking down), for reed.. for helping me realize the exact person i can and want to be. countless english professors for your garbling on and on about sweet bippies and apa formatting. allen for teaching me the person i don't want to be, andi for being independent, dad who... ya know. being dad. sir, for teaching me how to fly fish. :) mutter for loving unconditionally. for my mom who gets uptight about everything and yet we still happen to love her. and saul. the thing is, i can't say thank you cause english is a flawed language that does not have the words adequate enough to express how i feel. for alyssa for showing me the right way to do things. and thanks to me. for healing my blasted wrist so i don't have to type all of this with one hand. lets get real here. but i am not officially going to be a left handed person. someone told me that it would open up the creative side of me. i thought i was pretty creative before but i want to see what i'm like after. i'll probably explode. that's what is most likely to happen. and thanks v for vendetta. no words explain. ahhhhh. that's all i got. now i must slump to math class where our substitute teacher looks like a troll and talks like one too. i can seriously not understand a word she says. good thing i already taught myself the new material! wazoo! until next thursday. lol i'm going to like sayan that.